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If you are recently divorced or struggling to overcome a bad relationship, be careful not to seek comfort in the arms of someone else right away, regardless of how appealing they may be or how lonely you are. It is okay to be friends, but make sure you give yourself time to heal, which usually takes several months. Spend some time getting in touch with who you are and what you want out of life. Become a whole person within yourself, do not look to other people to make you happy or complete you as a person. You will have a lifetime of searching and disappointments until you learn that it has to come from within. When you find out who you are, then you will be ready to find someone who shares the same thoughts, feelings, philosophies, and goals that you have. Get rid of your own baggage before taking on someone else's or packing any more around than you are already carrying. It is not easy, but you can do it. Believe in yourself, do not depend upon other people to complete you. You can do it!
|Jennifer Mathes, Ph.D.|