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From the Top 10 Mistakes Moms Make with Their Exes by Sally Abrahms
Keep your ex-spouse informed about everyday happenings and problems concerning your child. This includes school events and extracurricular activities. You may not want him there, but your child probably does. Put your selfish feelings aside and consider your child's well being. And it will go a long way in building a peaceful, harmonious relationship.
Source: women.com/family/features/divorce/f0406toptenex.html
Your spouse is a grown up. Unless you are his/her personal secretary, mother, or still pretending that you are not DIVORCED, they are welcome to forge a relationship with the children (which they already should have been doing) by picking up the phone and um, well, TALKING WITH THE KIDS! This may seem rude, but it is their activity and this would be a wonderful way to, I don't know, BEGIN A RELATIONSHIP with them. My ex tries this crap all the time and I began telling ex, if ex is not willing to look @ the school website or talk with the kids (which, by the way, is how I get the info), then ex is just looking for a way to continue to NOT be in their lives, which is what ex did for the past umpteen years. You may think I'm sounding angry and bitter, but I'm tired of babying a grown person. I finally starting loving myself and stopped letting ex (and I quote), 'do their own thang' Grow up, be involved, be responsible. All I can do is let the children see ex's true colors for themselves. We moved out April 3, 2012, and under the guise of 'not wanting to interrupt kids school schedule,' ex has not seen kids since then. This is June 9, 2012. Since when does taking kids for an ice cream cone afterschool interrupt a school schedule? Everybody has a cell, but Ex has not called ONCE. They aren't infants with feeding times. I moved approximately 12 minutes away. Ex can grow a backbone, Put on their big girl/boy panties and GET INVOLVED. It is not selfish to invite your EX spouse to do the EXACT same things you did, do, and continue to do EVERY SINGLE DAY. Welcome to my world. Take it any way you want, but I've got total strangers telling me I look peaceful--folk I've NEVER seen before, telling me whatever workout regime I'm on is doing wonders for my aura. At least every other day, some person I've NEVER seen before tells me how peaceful I seem, not just any descriptive word, but PEACEFUL. That speaks volumes. Read the Proverbs, one chapter each day to coincide with the day (Pro. 2, for 2nd day of month, Pro. 6 for 6th day, etc) and you'll find your peace. One version of Proverbs 19:15 says Laziness brings on deep sleep, and the shiftless person goes hungry. Ex needs to stop being lazy, and logon to the website so they won't be hungry for knowledge. Nuff said. Get rid of the drama.
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